The key to your very own Modigliani!

"Good artists copy, great artists steal". The first time I read this quote in Will Gompertz book "What are you looking at?" I was stunned. Really? Steal?? After reading a bit more, a light bulb went off. "Stealing" as a first step towards making something your own, is very different from copying someone else's work. Learned something new.

Fast forward almost a year. My better half and I visit the LACMA museum in LA, one of our favorites. One of our personal jokes when visiting museums is deciding which piece of art we would like to take home. Hubby can't decide between two: a Picasso's blue period painting and "Young woman of the people" by Modigliani. As lately I've been playing with collage, without thinking much, I blurted "I will make you a Modigliani" and snapped a picture of the painting. 

Well, here it is. "The key to your very own Modigliani". Perhaps this does not make me a great artist, but I am definitely evolving as a wife :)

"The key to your very own Modigliani", the full collage.

Her head is full of butterflies

Years ago, when my father was still alive, whenever I said something that seemed funny to him, he would say "your head is full of butterflies". Both of us would  smile, and continue talking, sometimes agreeing to disagree. I wish he could see me now, see the butterflies starting to emerge from their cocoon and spread their wings. I hope a few of them will reach him, wherever he is and give him my everlasting love.

This is a collage I have just finished. Its title: "Her head is full of butterflies". To my dad with love.

Detail from "Her head is full of butterflies". Collage: Paper, old books, nylon, napkins, acrylic color.

Breathing easier now ...

In the hotel room, re-arranging images before next review.

For month now, I've been preparing for the Medium portfolio review. Printing all images, rehearsing the introduction to the brief meeting with the reviewers, researching the background and work of each one of them. Even applied for the Open Show, assuming my chances are very slim (with all the great photographers there, who will select me ...). Well, they did and this did nothing to make me feel more confident. It just added one more thing to rehearse during the morning walks.

Eight reviews, a short lecture and quite a few new friends later, I can finally breathe. It was definitely worth the effort and the money. Unsurprisingly, preparation proves itself as a very good thing ( yes, Donald, even for things which are less important than being president ...). Came back with new insights, new friends and maybe most importantly, a lot of motivation and ideas. And a big relaxed smile .....that will be replaced by anxiety before the next planned review at Photolucida next April ....

Telling an old family joke at the Open Show San Diego photograph by Victor Ramos 

"Prologue" a new addition to "Between here and then" portfolio. Back to work, inspired and with quite a few new ideas.

Pure magic

In a few days, I will present my Misthaven portfolio at the Open Show in San Diego. This explains why you can see me now talking to myself during the morning walk (no, I have not gone crazy, it just my way of preparing ...). Misthaven is all about exploring the unknown and discovering moments of pure magic. Like last week, in New York.

I stayed in NY four days, three of them found me wandering in Central Park. Every day discovering storybook places, taking me back to my childhood and beloved childhood books. Armed with the film camera and an expired roll of film, I try to capture the magic, trusting the god of photography will smile at me and help. I think he (she?) did. I am almost expecting to see Peter Pan sailing on the boats and making friends with the duck. Pure magic.

Magical moments in Central Park

Gates to wonderland, Central Park NY

Remembered light

Sally Mann has always been my inspiration. When I found out that her exhibit at the Gagosian gallery in NY coincides with my travel for the "Trees" exhibit opening - I could not be happier.

I arrived to NY at 8:30 in the morning, a bit crumpled after after the red-eye flight from LA. As the room at my hotel was not available yet, I left everything but my camera and wallet at the hotel storage and went out exploring. More accurately, I headed to the Gagosian Gallery (via Central Park..).

Sometimes, when expectations are very high, we set ourselves for disappointment. This was definitely NOT the case here. I headed into a spacious gallery, divided into three spaces. Black shiny marble floors, off-white walls, and the images....how can one describe the feeling of being surrounded by light? The photographs are not Sally Mann's typical Wet Plate Collodion images. Silver gelatin and a few Platinum prints. But the light, is the same light. Transcending place and time, a portrait of two artists, Cy Twombly, whose studio appears in the images and Sally Mann who created the images. Neither are with me in the room, yet somehow, both are present. I forgot about the sleepless night, the plane, the hotel. I just basked in the light. 

Remembered light, Sally Mann at the Gagosian Gallery

Another beauty from the exhibit

The name of the exhibit was inspired by Mark Strand's poem

The value of human life (as opposed to a skittle ...)

Books are probably my first love, photography - the most recent one. Last week, when I opened the box just delivered by our mailman, I experienced one of those rare moments when things come together and are just right. The box contained my copies of the newly released book "Seeing in SIXES" - a collection of 50 photographic projects edited by Brooks Jensen and Maureen Gallagher, impeccably printed and beautifully presented. One of these 50 projects is mine - " A portrait of shadows and light".  

page 282 - A Portrait of Shadows and Light

It is hard to express in words what seeing this project published means to me. While all work I do is very personal in nature, this project, that I hope I will be able to expand in the years to come - is special. It sheds light on a seemingly personal story - my mother in law's life, but this personal story is at the root of the identity of millions of people around the world. It is a story that should be told especially at a time when millions of refugees look for a place where they could simply breathe without feeling endangered. I know this beautiful book and my project will be infinitely less popular than some of the latest celebrity tweets, but when living beings are compared to skittles, we should all do what we can to remind ourselves and the world of the value and meaning of each individual life. Hear that, Mr. Trump??

"A portrait of shadows and light" full portfolio is displayed  here 

A personal project

Almost the end of the journey. A journey that started a year ago, with an email I sent to Aline Smithson, the amazing artist and teacher at Los Angeles Center of Photography. "I have no idea how you select the people you accept into your class, but if you are looking for someone who is really motivated and willing to work hard, you found one". She answered promptly, (as I will find out - she always does), that the students that took the prerequisite classes are her first priority. Needless to say I did not take these classes.... Fast forward a few weeks, getting notified I am one of the 13 students accepted into the personal project class led by Aline triggered a series of wild jumps around the apartment (my husband is used to crazy wife by now).

And here we are, at the end of 9 months of work, meetings, critiques, presentations. The class exhibit opens in three days. Looking back, it is amazing how much one can learn, change and grow. This is a good time to pause for a moment and be thankful for the new friends I made, the new understanding and tools acquired. Most of all for the privilege of studying with a woman I admire and now call my friend, Aline Smithson.

Exhibit on  the way ....

Pieces falling into place ....exhibit ready to go!

Perfectly imperfect

In my studio, besides my Nikon D750 and a collection of perfectly marvelous lenses, you can find now 2 (!!) plastic Holgas. What makes them stand out, is not their smaller size but the aqua color tape that goes around them, making sure the back cover will not fall off accidentally..... WHY?? (asks my husband who gave up understanding why his crazy wife will touch these "things").

Why indeed? Because with all the convenience of digital, I want to experience shooting with film, being careful about each frame, as each frame has a cost. Because I want to see how an image captured on film looks like, without the "wisdom" of the modern sensors. But the real reason is, I court the imperfect and the unexpected. Light leaks, blurs, fingerprints of the moment and the process. This is why, with very uncertain hands, I loaded my first roll of film into a funny plastic camera and went out to explore. First images.  

At Barnes & Nobles

Salt, pepper and sun by Amy Kanka Valadarsky

On the water

Being on the water, in a little boat that moves up and down with the waves changes the perspective. The horizon is no longer horizontal, the clouds borrow the shape of the waves, the water is the same grey color as the sky. Nature at its most majestic. Even more so when a humpback whale dives just in front of the boat. It is so easy to feel small and inconsequential. 

Yet looking at the sea otters floating happily wrapped in strands of kelp, I can not stop thinking we have almost wiped them out, killing them for their prized fur. On one of the mountains we can see the scar caused by a landslide, the result of less than wise development. In a few minutes it will be behind us. So easy to forget. A glimpse at the fragile equilibrium supporting all this grand beauty. 

Hints. Alaska August 2016

Sea otters, Alaska

The salmon forest

In august 2016 I spent ten days in Sitka, Alaska, volunteering for Sitka Conservation Society and the Alaska Raptor Center. This was my first trip to Alaska, my first encounter with the “The Salmon Forest.” Ten days and I was hooked. The intertwined story of fish, forest, and man unfolded daily, and like the best of stories, each new chapter drew me deeper into the plot.

Walking through the huge trees, proportions change. Time slows down, the air is more fragrant, the ground softer. Sculptured roots, remains of a wind storm that happened 90 years ago, red berries dot the green. Perched on a branch, a bald eagle looks me in the eye. Perhaps this is the same eagle I saw later flying holding a salmon in his claws. I hear the river before seeing it. Clear water, flowing gently towards the sea. When I look closer, I notice the moving shadows. The fish arrived!! Most are still at sea, but some are already making their way upstream. Just a few more days and their carcasses will dot the river floor, a feast for the bears and the eagles. The decayed remainders would feed the trees, make them grow bigger, faster. Fish do not grow on trees, but it seems trees do grow on fish.

Bald eagle by Amy Kanka Valadarsky

Unlike the bears, the fisherman, do not wait for the fish to come to them. Trollers and seiners return to the port, their ice box filled with fish. For many, salmon is much more than food. It is the roof above their head, the clock that dictates the daily schedule, their childhood memories, their legacy.

Troller returning to port

“There are many ways to kneel and kiss the ground,” said Rumi. Creating these images, telling nature’s stories, is my way. Through them, I celebrate its wisdom in pairing trees that shade the streams with fish who nurture the soil. Grateful for its bounty and generosity that can not be taken as granted. It is ours to enjoy and ours to safeguard.

Left behind

...and this time, I am the one who's left behind. A year ago this month I left him to live his life across the ocean and moved to the US. In the months before the move, the images seemed to pour out of me in a burst of activity. Tears transformed into images. A way of holding on even when I knew I won't. I thought I understood the meaning of leaving behind.

Now, after having him with me for four weeks, he's gone back. Starting a new chapter in his life, becoming a student. I'm left in an apartment that has more space and less joy. No more suitcases filling the bedroom, no more morning kiss from my big baby son. I am left with a Polaroid photo of him and the thank you card that brought me to tears when I read it. This time, I am the one who's left behind.  

Black and Blue

Back to the forest, by the whispering stream. A cluster of Foxgloves, patches of light. Far, far away from the noise of unneeded guns, unneeded death.

Black lives matter. Blue lives matter. Life matters. Really matters. All life. Policemen and children, women and men. The world in which we live, the one we tear apart, it matters. The world wears black and blue, bowing its head at unneeded death. Light cries and comforts. Life matters. 

Dreams for sale

I love to capture the dream behind reality. Usually, I would do this in a natural setting, this time I went to Beverly Hills. Getting from our 2 bedroom apartment to Rodeo Drive takes about 25 minutes by bus. Less than half an hour, and I am in a different world. A world with its own set of rules, etiquette, priorities. Beautiful - no doubt about that. Each store creates a world of illusions, a bubble of glamour. Surreal temptations waiting for the right people to pass by, lure them in. It is so fitting to have an exhibit of Dali's amazing work in the gallery on this street.

A taste of the surreal, dreams for sale. No Photoshop used in these images ....

Self portrait in a Lladro mirror ...

Louis Vuitton anyone?

Like Alice falling through the rabbit hole - an amazing piece by Dali, one of many on display in the gallery on Rodeo Drive. 

Real life .... for some

The butterfly

I saw him on the stairs of the restaurant. Beautiful. Almost still. Between life and death. Took a few pictures.  Thirty minutes later, on our way out, he was still there. I picked him up and took him home. when I touch him, the wings flutter for a few seconds, as if he wants to fly. His last movements. Still here, still beautiful. not for long. When life meets death.

Life meets death

Gathering dust

The power of simplicity (and amazing craftmanship ...). This is my favorite image from David A. Leffel's exhibit I saw last Saturday. This was the text displayed with this image:

"Gathering Dust, 1975. During the 1970's, Leffel still lifes became simpler and more minimal. Gathering Dust is an intimate painting with a mood of calm tranquility. The artist said: I tried to pait as quiet a painting as possible. It has almost no color, no movement. Just this little sprig of silver dollars seems alive. Everything else is drained. "

As I found out while reworking my artist statements for the xxx time (!), conveying something in a short, simple way is way more difficult that piling words on paper or color on canvass.

An adventure of the mind

A work of art is above all an adventure of the mind. The mind of the person who created it, the mind of all the people who would look at it. Infuse it with their own meaning. Project on it their feelings, memories and wishes. Translate it into their own language. Allowing the piece of art to touch them, maybe even transform them a tiny little bit. The hope and wish of every artist.

"Misthaven" images continue to appear. This is a good place to be thankful for all the great feedback I am getting on this portfolio who was recently published in Black and White magazine (Excellence award), Still Point Art quarterly (issue 22) and on Lenscratch.

Here are two brand new images for "Misthaven". I hope somewhere out there, there is a heart that will be touched by them. sending them out into the world to find that heart.

Misthaven #25 by Amy Kanka Valadarsky 

Water Colors

I chase light like others chase fame, or power, or money. Me, just give me my camera, shafts of light and a natural setting - and I am happy. Knee deep in the water, or laying on the ground, the world becomes limited and limitless at the same time. 

Here, I chased the colors of the wind and the water in a lily pond. Colors... water ...hmmm....water ...  colors. Water Colors!! An idea is born :) 

The first sketches - "Water Colors" photo collage by Amy Kanka Valadarsky

Listening to images

Funny how images are born. I started experimenting with Cyanotypes, and was looking at images I shot in the last few month in order to find one I can play with. One image in particular looked like a good candidate, and as usual, this was an image that at the time, I did not even mark as one worth earmarking for future use. Once changed to black and white this image started whispering, obviously wanting to tell me something.

A few minutes and a few more adjustments later the whisper turned to a clear statement: "I belong to Misthaven" (The photography portfolio I thought I finished months ago ...). Can I not listen to this voice? Of course not, hence Misthaven 28 joined its friends. See top 20 images from Misthaven portfolio here

Meeting a great photographer

Photograph by Mugur Varzariu

During my very short visit to Israel, between family visits and family meals, we managed to spend an evening at the International Festival of Photography, this year a happening organized in Jaffa/Tel Aviv by the sea.

The whole event was an eye opener, and my first real meeting with the contemporary Israeli photography scene. While there were quite a few Israeli artists I loved, the first images that caught my eye were Mugur Varzariu's images. A Romanian photographer, who left a successful career in Strategic Marketing to become a fine art photographer. His images of the gypsies, were breathtaking in their capture of simple human moments. I really loved them, and thought you would too ...

Mugur Varzariu. A name worth remembering.

The Roma people, Mugur Varzariu

Let the rain kiss you

It does not matter where I go, I always arrive to the same place. My place. Nature.

Whether in Israel, California, Japan or Germany, it is always the sun, the smell of rain, the shadow of the trees that tempt me, whisper in my ear. 

This time, the place is a small pond, a walking distance from my mother in law apartment in Frankfurt, Germany. Despite being the end of April, it is chilly outside. We walk around the pond, and just when there is no shelter in sight - it starts to rain. My husband holds the umbrella, while I wait for the birds to fly over the lake.  Try to be careful, as my camera, unlike me, does not like to be kissed by the rain ....

Rainy day by Amy Kanka Valadarsky

Spring in the park, Frankfurt, Germany. April 2016